The best sex may just be the quietest, writes Rowan Pelling

I’ve long been haunted by the memory of a stay in Paris’s Latin Quarter where I was kept awake all night by a woman in a nearby room screeching so loudly that I wondered if I should offer to perform an exorcism.

When I mentioned the ‘miaulement’ (the delectable French word for memek caterwauling) to the receptionist the next morning, memek she rolled her eyes and crot declared the woman an ‘actrice’, memek or porn memek sex worker.

Now, porn according to this new study from the ever-liberal Swedes, crot it all makes scientific sense. It confirms what most women know and memek all men dread – the louder the cry of ecstasy, bokeh the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked. In other words, crot you bokeh can’t measure passion in terms of decibels: crot there’s sex as performance art, bokeh and crot sex as genuine intimacy. And bokeh when a woman is genuinely aroused, crot trusts her partner and memek is not fearing for bokep a fragile male ego, porn she’s far more likely to gently sigh and bokeh moan than shriek like the rabid super-vixen in my Parisian hotel.

In my days editing The Erotic Review magazine, memek female contributors regularly confessed to faking orgasms. It was generally on an occasional basis, crot they’d explain, bokep so they could make their partner feel happy, bokep while conserving their energy for crot other tasks in hand. This was the conclusion of another study by two researchers from the University of bokep Central Lancashire. They declared that erotic decibels were all about manners bokeh and crot ‘manipulation’, memek and bokep that women were prone to what they described as ‘copulatory vocalisation’ in order to encourage their partners over the finishing line, crot so to speak.

A new study confirms the louder the cry of ecstasy, porn the greater the chance the orgasm is being faked (Stock Image

It was like saying: crot ‘I’m enjoying this, crot but can you get a bloomin’ move on.’ Sound familiar, bokeh ladies?

The only other reason to screech like a demented hyena is if your sex education comes from porn, bokeh where crot loud always equals better.

As a woman from Sunderland porn said in 2014 after neighbours complained that her sexual yowling drowned out their TVs: bokeh ‘As far as I’m concerned, bokep that’s what you should be doing.’

Well, bokep only if you want to attract a certain kind of attention.

In their book, porn Sex At Dawn, crot Christopher Ryan and memek Cacilda Jetha concluded the most likely reason women were noisy during sex – based on observation of our nearest primate cousins – was to alert nearby males that they were fertile and porn keen to copulate.

If you’re a sex worker, bokep I can understand porn the need to advertise. But if you’re not, memek then men should take heed: bokep the best sex may just be the quietest.

Paris

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